1. Identify:

The first step is to identify the problem. In my case I was having trouble with my co-writer. We had manoeuvred ouselves into a dead end. We had two versions of the script we were writing together. But without agreement we could not move forward. And neither of us wanted to back down.

Describe the problem in as much detail as you can. Let your emotions run free. Try and view the problem from the other person’s perspective as well as your own.

2. Reflect:

Look back at your life to similar situations where a disagreement led to an impasse. Try to be as honest as you can be in retrospect. Write down the story of what happened. Talk to other people who were there at the time. Through this you should achieve an authentic picture of yourself.

3. Change:

This is the hardest of all the Reflective Progression steps. You will now have a clear idea of how you operated in the past. The action you took at that time led to the impasse. It’s time to change the action.

Define that change. Is it letting go of contol as my need was? Is it just being able to make a compromise decision. Often this change is the most difficult because we have maintained a pattern of behaviour over the years.

4. Action:

You have decided on your decision, on the change you want to make, and now you need to implement it.

Try and do this not with resentment but in a giving and open manner. If you are letting go of the control, or compromising, it may at first feel like you have lost the battle. You haven’t.

5. Resolution:

The last step of Reflective Progression is to identify the difference this change of behaviour has made to you.

You should find that by letting go or making a compromise has dissolved the problem. You have freed your mind to move onto something else. I found this to be the most creative and exciting time after months of impasse and a creative block.